When I first thought of blogging, the vision I had in mind was a platform to share life experiences and reach out to people who had similar experiences or challenges whatever the case may be and assure them that someone else understood their plight perfectly. 

Being and adult in her earlier 20s trying to balance school and excel in life in general  comes with a lot of challenges and questions. There are days filled with doubts, despair and second guessing every decision one has made or is about to make. There are days when everything seems to come together, it’s almost like the universe is in support and for those days I am extremely grateful.

As much as I tell myself I’ll be consistent with blogging and sharing on here, the truth is there are some days when there’s no strength to put the happenings in my life into words that others will assimilate. Sometimes when I manage to find the strength, the words to use will fail me and I’m back to square one.

Currently, my school is on long vacation and we are resuming in about a month roughly. Back in July when school was about to let out for vacation, I remember making plans of how much I’ll throw myself into blogging and build an audience and what not. Well today is the 23rd of September and this is the first time I’ve found the strength  through out this vacation to write a blog post. Yes I I’m disappointed in myself, all those times when it crossed my mind to write

 I should have just started stringing the words together instead of waiting for the perfect time when the words will come to me. 

This whole experience of waiting for the right time to start something  has thought me that there’s no perfect time to do or start anything.  Just start it today!!! Do it no matter how confused you feel or how much you doubt your ability to do or start whatever it is. Just start!!!! Don’t let your self doubt get the better of you..

When I woke up today, I didn’t even think of blogging. I just randomly logged into my account and here I am writing a post! I don’t know how the words are coming together or what my next line will be, but all that matters is I’m doing it and that’s all that counts 🤗🤗

Have a wonderful Saturday my loves 💗💗💗 thank you for coming on this journey with me!



I woke up this morning and I was just thinking, why do we find it so difficult to support our own? Why can’t we lift and build each other up as easily as we do these celebrities that never acknowledge it. 

   I’ll start with compliments, there’s nothing absolutely wrong in complimenting or praising a friend’s outfit or makeup or celebrating a new mile stone they just reached. Nothing absolutely wrong! provided it’s genuine.  But some of us are so stingy with compliments and supportive ststments, we will easily give strangers compliments than our friends.  Take for example your friend posts a picture or a quote on social media , it’ll take nothing from you to drop a supportive comment or  an emoji under that post.

Recently, I was discussing how to achieve brand growth at a grassroot level  with an acquaintance of mine that just started a clothing store and she told me  to achieve that, she intends to pay a popular blog on Instagram to publicize her collections so she wanted me to suggest  a good one. I was surprised at first, and so I  explained that by grassroot level I meant immediate family and close friends. And I suggested to her, why don’t  just save money first and get your girlfriends to do a photoshoot in the outfits and repost on their pages and tag these blogs seeing as most of the friends in question had quite an audience on Instagram via their followers.  Her reply was even more astonishing  and made me think really hard, she said she had thought of it and mentioned it to her friends but they gave her a condition that in return they had to keep the outfits and also get free clothes. These are friends who repost  other bigger brands pictures on their indivual pages for free!  You see the irony right? We are more than willing to support already grown brands but we can’t help our close friends build up theirs too. Maybe some of us lend support to the wrong people unconsciously,  But we all  have friends or acquaintances who want to launch a business or start up something but are lacking the motivation to do it, why not try as much as possible to be the push and support that finally makes that friend to get started on the business.  Of course  as a good  friend you  might want to point out the obvious risks  involved in that line of business, it could be that there are many other  competitors already in that line of binesess or there might be no visible returns from it in a short period of time. Regardless, all this doesn’t matter really.  Provided that the friend in question, is aware of all these risks in the first place and is still willing to put in  hard work and efforts  to create positive results, support them wholeheartedly and cheer them on🤗🤗

The truth is there’s room for everyone to shine. If only we will be willing to make it possible for us all to shine and that is  simply by lending support when and where it’s needed directly.[this is important, make sure you are lending support to the right person and place].  Cultivate  a habit of building with loved ones in your circle if one person wins, it’s a win for everybody in the circle because you all worked towards it and if everyone is winning, that’s even better. 

I know it’s obvious that  I am referring to ladies mostly. The truth is, it’s mostly us women that find it hard to build and support each other, we are the ones who are more prone to holding petty grudges against each other😐 men get along better than women so team work comes naturally to them.
Today, make a conscious effort to show up and support that friend who is struggling to find their way, just be present with your support.
Cheers to the middle of the week! And let’s shine and win together🙌💗💗💗#growth#womensupportingeachother#building#supporting#together


Sometimes we worry too much about  the wrong things.  We tend to focus so much energy on little things that don’t really matter.(I’m guilty 😂🙈) We stay stressing and caring about everyone’s opinions about what we should be doing or not doing with our lives, rather than focusing on what God has in store for us. We listen to wrong voices and are distracted by the noise from it. If you are not careful, you’ll start living other people’s vision and dreams.

   Don’t seek for approval wanting to fit in, where you weren’t meant to be (this struggling and fitting in, is something I struggled with personally and still do occasionally, but I’ve learnt not to make a big deal out of it!) You are unique and designed with a  purpose different from everyone else.  Do not fall into the trap of  completing someone’s happiness before your own that you become so drained, valuing their success over your own; This usually happens when we let the negative things we hear about ourselves define us. If you hear something negative about yourself from anyone, don’t sweat it!! I know sometimes it’s hard not to react defensively but let it go!! focus on soaring higher!!💪💪 and building you.     

Sometimes it’s absolutely ok to be selfish and say “NO” and to not care about what others have to say about your journey . Truth is people will always have something to say about you, sometimes it’s good & other times it’s just negative stuff.

Take care of yourself, by choosing and loving yourself first and chasing after your dreams. Life is too darn short to be worrying about everyone else’s journey or story.

Embrace the journey you are on and appreciate every step towards your own happiness. This is your life, your vision and your story, no one will write it the way you want it. Cherish your goals and know that whatever point you are at now, God’s got you always❤.. #upliftment #fridaymornings#womanhood#positivevibesonly#faith#choice#selflove

Sending you all love and positive vibes💕💕💕 ~ Nonyeofficial.


   Be careful who you allow in your personal space. It is vital to invest in people who are putting just as much goodness in you as you do them. If you are surrounded by energy drainers and nay-sayers; those people who only have negative things to say about others, you’ll start to see yourself take part in such negative acts and unconsciously join in bringing others down!
      You would be surprised how many people you have in your circle that aren’t really for you if they don’t stand to benefit. I’m a witness to this, as someone who loves to meet people and be in the company of others, I tend to always take to them quickly, involving them in my life and all that concerns me, forgetting to put some barriers until I know them well enough🙈🙈. In the short run it turns out they don’t really care about me, they  are just there to know what’s happening around me and talk about it behind my  back  and not necessarily to build  me up. I’ve slowly  learnt  that not everyone who seems genuine at first needs to be all up in my business, time will tell what and who they really are. 
     Surround yourself with people who will build you up, empower you to keep chasing your goals, pray with you when the going is tough, generally be around people that wanna see you succeed and make efforts to see that happen for you..
As you are reading this, take some time to evaluate and think about everyone around you or in your space in one way or the other.  Ask yourself when was the last time this person prayed with you ? Or said something encouraging after you bared your heart to them. If you can’t seem to remember, you need to let such association go let them be on the sidelines and watch you soar. They don’t have to be part of your journey and success story if they aren’t building alongside you. 
     Finally, evaluate yourself too! Make sure you are one of those friends who bring more than just gossip and bickering to the table. Basically I’m saying if you want positive people around you, you have to first be a positive person also.
Take time off today, think about someone who has been nothing but supportive, helpful and has been there for you through every storm, that friend who challenges you, pushes you, makes sure you are staying focused and putting God in the center of it all, let them know how much you appreciate their efforts 😊😊🤗

P.S: this week let’s inspire and empower more than we tear down! Have a great week loves❤


      Looking at this one might ask what does she mean by “dont entertain what you don‘t want” it’s as simple as this, some of the things we tolerate from folks in our daily lives, we don’t necessarily need that kind of energy or vibe around us but we still let it happen. We let that happen not because we can’t put an end to it or stop it entirely but because in some parts of us, we  derive some guilty satisfaction from whatever that may be (I’m guilty sometimes, so if this is you there’s absolutely nothing to be shy about 😄)

   Take for example *I’m talking from a ladies perspective now* you meet this guy on social media, you all chat and all,then you exchange contacts and coincidentally you work busy schedules all day so the only time you all really catch up is late at night. Mind you anything at dark already sets up a different mood,(that free extra outgoing feeling) 🙈😂 he may ask  “how was your day? Or even ask for a picture” maybe the first couple of weeks and then subsequently you all are still flirting and still haven’t made serious plans to explore whatever is going on outside social media. It gets to a point, in the process of exchanging pictures at night, he might  finally ask for nudes, afterall you all have been flirt texting😉😉 you may hesitate  but after some more sweet talking you cave in. note this after you send that  picture, no matter the compliments he gives your body at that moment  you already lost some self respect  because truth be told during the day you’ll probably never entertain such relations that may lead to asking for nudes.. you might feel strange the next day, but you already crossed the line and since  the guy is so good with words, you keep on entertaining the attention thinking it’s something genuine. 

 Note; This doesn’t only happen in a relationship setting, I just randomly gave that example as an illustration. It can happen anywhere, you as an individual you know what you entertain  or give attention to, that deep  dowm you can truly do without. It’s not easy but give it a rest and find other wholesome ways to build and structure yourself. 

   Basically all  I’m saying is, use your time, money, energy, love and gifts wisely. Protect your peace and self worth. *Stop entertaining anything and everything giving you attention today, no attention is worth loosing your respect or peace over!!* Always remember that 😊😊 

Have a great day loves❤❤ don’t forget to drop a comment 😊


Hey everyone🤗🤗. How are you all doing? I’m so sorry for the long lapse in my postings.  I took a much needed break to catch up on school work and work better on the kind of content I put out for you all. I’m partly back for now 😊 this semester is a tough one so I might still be on and off, but I’ll work harder to put up multiple contents at once.  Have a great day y’all ❤


Somewhere between the silence and lack of words,  two lips meet on a cold quiet night. 

Love is born,  the first fruit of this union. Now we have something growing between us.  Love. It starts easy. 

In a relationship between two people, it is said that there are three personalities involved; you,  me and the love we share. Growth in this would mean investment of time, self and resources to the growth of this Trinity. 

Something easier said than done. 

So what exactly does it mean to love? To be Part of a whole? To be lost in another person that you literally feel like you’re sharing two bodies. Swapping between two identities. Living and thinking for two people. What does it mean to succumb to an emotion that can dissolve you in it’s essence and make you drunk on fantasies and lies. What does it mean to leave yourself open and vulnerable to a person whose heart you’re yet to fully know and intentions to understand ? Love is diving into the unknown head first. Love is a religion of Us. A devotion to our emotions. A high on hormones. Love is giving a person a blade and showing them where it can cut the deepest. Love is fearless. And love comes in various forms; from the warm light in a child’s eyes when he smiles at his mother to the steamy breath shared amongst lovers in a kiss. It’s  also the  tears of an orphan at the grave of his parents and the animalistic groan of a mother praying in tears for the survival of her sick and dying child. 

I’ve seen love in various forms but it still eludes me all that love entails or is.  To me love is a mysterious attraction, completely irrational and selfless. It’s our justified and culturally accepted insanity. 

Love is deliberate. Love is hard. Love is intentionally abandoning oneself for a belief in something bigger than us. Love is the future of Us. 
So what’s your opinion on/of love? Kindly drop your comments below. Thanks


    The word “MAKEUP” is a universal word used variably for different situations but is generally known for beauty enhancement mostly in ladies although some guys also use makeup for different purposes mostly concealing purposes or in the case of models, it helps them to look better in whatever attire they are showcasing depending on the theme of the designer.
     Personally make up to me is a way individuals enhance their various physical attributes that they aren’t exactly comfortable with or  being glaringly obvious  to the public eye, so they apply makeup to what ever that is, to make it much more appealing to the eye. It is also used by actors in movies to create illusions that would portray their role to their audience perfectly (for example if a 30 year old lady is playing the role of a 60 year old , a lil makeup will help create the illusion of wrinkles and what a 60 year old face will look like in general)

    With all these roughly explained, it always irks me the wrong way when I hear people say that a lady who can’t appear bare faced in public doesn’t have self confidence and to me that is totally wrong. People have different complexes that they deal with privately and if there is a slight chance that applying that makeup will boost their confidence and help them get through the day, then by all means keep your judgements to yourself. For example, If I had patches of pimples on my face or any funny discoloration and I have a huge power point presentation to get through at work before the board members, I definitely won’t want them to see that on my face, funny as it may sound, it may even be distracting for them and uncomfortable for me. Applying concealer over that would help me feel better and much more at ease because I am guaranteed that the focus will be on my presentation and not why my face looks funny😅.
     The same way we strut into a room exuding confidence, head held high knowing that our outfits for that day looks great and not a hair is out of place, that’s the same feeling for someone who uses makeup. There is no greater joy vain as it may seem knowing that you look perfectly great!!😊😊 the confidence that one gets from knowing they look great propels them forward, gets them through that meeting and helps them to perform better because they know they look great. It gives them an edge and they are much more bold and ready to take on anything.

     So my advice to you, if you are one of those people that are always to quick to judge and condemn people that use makeup or even enhancements of any sorts in general to make them feel good, Please keep your judgements to yourself provided they play their roles well and get the job done on time, you have absolutely nothing to worry about! It’s their life so let them live it the way they think best 😊😊😊 you would be happier you let them be😊 so shout out to all those ladies whom that extra layer of lipstick or perfectly winged eyeliner gets through the day, keep doing you and stay winning!!!❤❤❤


  Hello everyone, I am sincerely sorry for the inconsistency with my blog posts.  Anyways I was reading an article that capitalized on how to be social and conduct ourselves appropriately around  other individuals So I decided  to put it on here because I was sure someone will benefit.  Being social can help you build meaningful connections, come out of your shell, and feel less isolated. You don’t even have to be a social butterfly in order to talk to people. All you need is good instincts, confidence, and some basic conversational skills. Once you’re comfortable talking to people, you can work on making plans with them and spending more time socializing. If you want to know how to be social, see the steps below.


Let go of your fear of rejection. One of the reasons that people can tend to feel antisocial is because they’re afraid of being rejected if they make an effort to hang out with people. Sure, this can happen, and we’ve all felt the sting of trying to chat with someone only to have that person be rude or turn away. But don’t let this fear stop you from saying hi to people, inviting people to hang out with you, or trying to make small talk with someone you don’t know very well. The fact of the matter is, most people are pretty kind once you give them a chance; as for the people who may not warm to your attempts at conversation, they’re not worth it anyway.

Though it may sound corny, you never know until you try. If you try to hang out with someone and they turn you down, then you’re no worse off than you were before. However, if that person wants to hang out with you, then you’re on the way to gaining a friend. There are far more benefits to trying to hang out with someone than drawbacks, so what’s the harm in trying?All of us face rejection in our lives. If you face rejection from time to time, you’ll only be working on developing maturity and thick skin; life is all about how you respond to rejection, instead of trying to avoid it. Just take a deep breath, relax, and remind yourself that the worst that can happen when you try to be social is that the person doesn’t want to be social back. Is that really a tragedy? It may feel like one, but in the scheme of things, someone turning you down will only be a minor setback.


Have approachable body language. One simple way to be more social is to look more approachable to the people you might interact with. If you stand with an open posture, keep your hands at your sides instead of folded across your chest, and make eye contact with people when they talk to you, then you’ll be much more approachable than if you were hunched over, totally absorbed in your cell phone, or fidgeting with the bottom of your sweater. If you have a positive look on your face and a friendly demeanor, then people will be much more likely to talk to you and to think you want to talk to them.

You may have closed-off body language without even knowing it. If you’re shy, then it’s natural for you to retreat into your shell as a way of warding people off. Work on opening up your body little by little, facing people instead of turning away from them, and looking like you want people to talk to you instead of like you want to be left alone.Just making an effort of smiling more can have a huge impact. If people see you as friendly, they’ll be much more likely to ask you questions or to strike up a conversation with you.


As the saying goes, there’s nothing small about small talk. You may feel like you’re allergic to talking to people about the weather or the local sports team, but this is the way you can begin to develop a more serious bond and to get to know people on a deeper level. While you may want to jump right into a discussion of whether or not there’s a God or about your complicated relationship with your mother, you’ll need to be able to make more superficial conversation with people before you can get to a deeper level. Don’t think that you’re above small talk or that you have no time for it; instead, think of it as a way of moving towards truly getting to know people. Here are some pointers for making small talk:

Okay, so maybe talking about the weather isn’t the most exciting thing in the world. But you can use the weather to talk about more interesting topics. For example, if someone complains about how the rain has kept them cooped up all weekend, you can ask if they had time to watch something good on TV; use it as an excuse to bring up your favorite movie or TV show.If a person is wearing an unusual piece of jewelry, you can compliment it and see if there’s a story behind it. Maybe it’ll lead into a discussion of how that person’s grandmother gave it to them, or of how that person got her Murano glass necklace in Italy, which is a place where you’ve been dying to go.When you make small talk, avoid asking yes or no questions that can cut a conversation short. Instead, ask questions that require a longer answer. Instead of asking, “Did you do anything fun this weekend?” you can ask, “What did you do over the weekend?” so the person has more room to talk.Avoid asking overly personal questions at first. Stick to the easy topics, such as hobbies, sports, bands, or pets, and wait for the person to open up a bit.


Be interested, not interesting. You may think that the best way to be social is to make people think that you’re an awesome person who they need to spend more time with. Well, this certainly couldn’t hurt, but the fact of the matter is, people are much more likely to want to socialize with people who are interested in them, instead of people who are just interesting in general. While you can certainly reveal information about yourself, one way to socialize more is to show a real interest in people by asking them questions and showing that you care about their lives. Here are some things you can ask them about:

Their favorite bands, sports teams, movies, or TV showsTheir hobbies or interests outside of work or schoolFavorite places that they’ve traveledIf they have any petsHow they like the place where they liveHow their interview/basketball game/weekend trip wasTheir plans for the weekend, the summer, or the holiday break.


Embrace new people. People who have trouble being social are usually afraid, distrustful, or just skeptical about new people. They may think that new people have nothing to offer them and that they are better off sticking to the familiar. Well, you should think that, to new people, you are certainly worth getting to know – and that you’re a new person to somebody. Instead of being skeptical of new people until they prove themselves to you, try to assume that most people have good intentions and give them the benefit of the doubt. If you approach new people as potential friends instead of potential enemies, you’ll be on your way to being much more social.

If you’re standing around in a group and see someone you don’t know, introduce yourself instead of awkwardly smiling at or looking away from that person. Everyone will be impressed by your initiative.If you see a new person who doesn’t know anyone, go out of your way to make that person feel comfortable. This is a basic kindness that won’t go unnoticed.


Learn to read people. Another way to be social when you talk to people is to learn to read them, even when they are saying the opposite of how they feel. You should become a master at decoding body language, and should be able to tell how a person is feeling just from how that person is standing or by the look on his face when he’s not talking. If someone is telling you that he’s doing fine, but you can see that his eyes are puffy or that his clothes look a bit disheveled, then you may find that he actually needs a helping hand.

To make conversation with people, you should go beyond the surface and try to see what the person is really trying to tell you. If you’re in a group and one person is trying to back away or looking around, then he may be bored and uncomfortable and may need some help.If you’re talking to someone who keeps checking the time, or shifting from foot to foot, then that person may be late or anxious; it’s okay to say that you see that the person has a lot going on and that you look forward to chatting later.


■Reach out to your current acquaintances. You may think that you have trouble being social because you don’t know a single person worth socializing with or that there’s no one around who would want to hang out with you. That’s where you’re wrong! Your life is full of potential friends, and it’s up to you to seek them out. You may not realize that the girl who sits behind you in math, the guy on your swim team, or even your neighbor, could end up being one of your best friends. Seek out people you know a little bit and ask them to grab a coffee or to hang out in a low-key setting. You’ll soon be on your way to making new friends.

■Don’t be shy. Asking someone to hang out in a low-pressure way, such as grabbing coffee or going to an interesting lecture or movie together, isn’t a big deal. You’re not inviting someone to prom or asking them to marry you. It’s just asking for a bit of time.Think about it: is there someone in your life who seems cool, and who you’re always wishing you knew a little better? What’s the worst that can happen when you approach that person?

■Find new hobbies or interests. Another way to build connects with more people is to take up a new hobby or an interest. This can be in your school, at work, or in your community. You can take a yoga class and befriend the person on the mat next to yours. You can join a rec volleyball team and make friends with the people on your team. You can take an art class and find a few people who share your interests. The more you put yourself out there, the more likely you are to connect with people who interest you.

If you spend more time doing something you care about, you are also more likely to make friends with the people around you because they’ll share your interests. Even if you’re just developing a passion for a new hobby, you may find someone who shares that common bond.Finding new hobbies or interests will also help you become more social simply because you’ll get in the habit of stepping out of your comfort zone and putting yourself out there more, which is exactly what you need to do to be social.

■Offer more invitations. People who are social are always inviting people to hang out with them. You don’t have to throw a huge party to extend more invitations to people. Don’t be shy about asking people to hang out with you and work on thinking of something you could ask people to do with you. Just smile, extend the invitation, and make it clear that it’s no big deal if the person is too busy to hang out. Here are some ways you can extend invitations for people to hang out with you:

Ask someone in your class to be part of a study group with youInvite someone you know to do some work in a coffee shop with youIf someone you know shares your love for a certain band or actress, invite that person to a concert or a movieAsk a coworker to step out for lunch or coffee with youOrganize a happy hour at workInvite a few people over to watch a popular TV show, such as Orange is the New Black, and order some pizzaOrganize an informal softball, basketball, or soccer gameAsk a friend to help you run a poetry reading at your home or in a coffee shop.

■Accept more invitations. If you’re worried about being social, then chances are that you’re the kind of person who tends to turn down any invitations you are given. Though you shouldn’t hang out with people who make you uncomfortable, you should work on giving people a chance. If someone invites you out to a study session, party, or happy hour, instead of instinctively saying no, you should give it a shot. If you really don’t have a good time there, then you can always leave – no one will be forcing you to stay. Half of success in life comes from just showing up.

If you’re really nervous about accepting an invitation because you’re not quite sure what to expect, try to ask a few questions to get the lay of the land so you feel more comfortable. If you’re invited to a party, see if anyone else you know will be there. If you’re invited to a concert, ask what the venue is like. If you feel like you have more of an idea of what to expect, you’ll be less nervous about the opportunity.

■Spend more time out of the house. Though you may not wander into an instant party the second you step out of the house, you definitely won’t have a chance to be more social if you’re cooped up indoors. Just being outside gives you the chance to strike up a conversation or to meet someone new. Instead of studying at home, go to a coffee shop, where you might start a conversation with the person sitting next to you. Going out to grab some tea or lunch will give you the opportunity to run into someone you know, and to sit down together for a few minutes. The more time you spend out in the world, the more likely you’ll be to connect with someone.

Just being out in the world will help you form a habit of being around other people. The more time you spend around other people, the more you’ll get used to greeting people, making small talk, and alleviating any social anxiety you may have.Also, just being out in the world, getting some sunlight and fresh air, will make you feel less isolated and more likely to connect with other people. It can be hard to socialize when you’re used to being on your own.

■Be more involved at your workplace or school. If you want to build more connections with people, then one of the best ways to go about it is to be more involved in your workplace or your school. If you have a job, try to get involved in organizing happy hours, holiday parties, work volunteering events, or Sunday softball leagues. There should be a committee you can join or an event that you can help run, which should help you get to know more people. As far as school goes, joining the newspaper, yearbook, student council, or soccer or tennis team can also help you feel more involved and to get to know more people.

Even if doing these things doesn’t help you instantly make a best friend, it’ll help you learn to work closely with other people, to be part of a team, and to have daily social interactions with people.You don’t have to run for president if you join the student council. Start small, and join the school spirit committee or another aspect of the organization that can help you have an impact without being in the spotlight.

■Avoid building all of your social connections on the Internet. Okay, so if you’re part of a meaningful online community where you truly exchange ideas with people who share your interests, then great. But if you’re the kind of person who spends hours on Facebook, g-chat, Twitter, or other forms of social media or interaction without actually talking to anyone in person, then you may have a problem. Though having someone like your photo or posting a comment on someone’s Facebook wall can bring you some momentary joy, it won’t substitute having a meaningful interaction with someone in-person.

In fact, socializing too much on social media can hold you back from having real interactions in person; avoid using social media as a crutch and spend more time talking to people face-to-face.You can use Facebook to be in touch with people, but make sure you message them to hang out in person, use it to invite people to real events, and generally make an effort to meet up with people outside of the Internet. Otherwise, you won’t be truly socializing – you’ll only be taking superficial measures to feel connected with people.


Give yourself time to come out of your shell. Though building connections and learning to engage in meaningful conversation is important, you also have to know how to go beyond the surface and to really make relationships last. The key here is that this part takes time, and that even social butterflies may not make meaningful connections all the time. The important thing is that you give yourself time to open up and to come out of your shell instead of expecting that you’ll have five BFFs after a month. Have patience with yourself and the people around you and know that it will take a while to build meaningful friendships.

First, you may just be at the acquaintance level with someone, and after a few cups of coffee or a lunch date, you may call that person your friend. After a few months, you may start to really open up to each other, and soon enough, that person will be one of your nearest and dearest. But if you rush the relationship, it may fizzle out; instead, expect that it’ll take some time to make true friends.

■Stay in touch with people. Another way to build meaningful social connections is to stay in touch with the people that matter to you. Sure, making small talk and going to a few parties can help you get to know people, but if you want to stay friends, you can’t just fall off the grid. If you turn down three or four invitations from someone, then that person may give up on you. If you don’t answer your phone or respond to text messages, then your relationships will fizzle out. However, if you make an effort to check in with your friends at least once a week, to make plans routinely, and to let people know you’re thinking of them, then you’ll be on your way to making real social bonds.

Though you don’t have to always be around, you don’t want to develop a reputation for being a flake, either. If you want to build real relationships with people, then they have to feel like they can depend on you.

■Put dates on your calendar. Another way to make your relationships with people last is to simply force yourself to fill your calendar with social endeavors. Now, you don’t have to force yourself to hang out with people every day of the week, but you should make plans at least once or twice a week so you maintain a social life. Just saying that you’ll be at a party or concert and putting it on your calendar can go a long way in making you feel like your social life is developing in a meaningful way. Once the dates are down on your calendar, you’ve made a commitment, and it’s important to stick to it.

If you’re having a really busy week, then see if you can combine a social situation with something you have to do. Maybe invite a friend to study for your history exam with you or ask her to join you in the weekly yoga class you’ve committed to.Of course, it’s equally important to make time for yourself. If you’re naturally introverted or have trouble being social, then you can’t go from being alone all the time to hanging out with a million friends all the time without difficulty. Make sure you make time for “me time” and that you don’t sacrifice it for anything.

■Aim for quality over quantity. You may think that being social means talking to a million people all day and all night. In reality, it’s more important to be social with a few people you really care about regularly instead of filling your life with a bunch of people that don’t really matter to you. Just a handful of good friends can go a long way in making you feel less alone and more outgoing. Find the people who really matter to you and commit to spending time with them.

Of course, hanging out in big groups can be fun every once in a while. You can mix that up with more intimate, one-on-one sessions with the people who are close to you.

■Be a good listener. Another way to develop closer social bonds is to learn to truly listen to people. This means putting away your phone and other distractions when someone is talking to you, making eye contact, and not interrupting the person who is trying to tell you something. It also means remembering what the person told you so you can follow up on it later. Just sitting down with someone you care about and giving that person your time will show him or her that you’re a friend who is worth keeping.

If your friend is talking to you about a struggle she’s having, try not to compare her life to yours too much or it’ll minimize the problem. Instead, take her situation at its own face value and use your experiences to provide advice.If your friend tells you that he or she has something important coming up, then you should check in before the event happens to wish him or her luck, or ask how it went. This shows that you listen and you care.

■Show people how much they mean to you. Another way to go beyond the superficial social connections with people is to show them how much they really mean to you. This means taking the time to thank your friends for doing you favors or just letting that person know how much his or her friendship means to you. Though you may feel shy about letting people know how much you appreciate them, making this effort can go a long way in helping you develop long-lasting and important social bonds.

You can do a favor for your friend, such as picking up coffee or lunch for her, to show how much she means to you.Don’t think that thank you cards are outdated. Writing one for a friend who has helped you out can really make a difference.Give your friends love, positivity, and compliments. Tell them why they’re awesome, from complimenting their sense of humor to their ability to listen.

I hope someone reading this will be able to relate. If  you already perfected any of these tell me which with a comment.. have a great weekend y’all ❤❤❤


Hey guys!! So I just thought I should put it out there. Sometimes words are not just enough to explain what I am discussing, so I have decided to always add images that will appeal to y’all  aesthetically as well as drive my point across. So some posts may contain more images than words or the other way round..either way stick with me as we go on this ride 😘😘😘 happy Easter in advance my loves😗.